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We all like to think that we’re doing a pretty good job in the bedroom. But are you sure that your man thinks you’re doing as good as YOU think you are?
We talked with a variety of relationship experts and sex therapists about what kind of things might turn men off in the bedroom. Not everyone is going to be sex goddess, but you may be turning into a real sex dud if you’re doing any of these 9 things:
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1. You’ve Turned Your Bedroom Into An Office
No one wants to be reminded of their stressful workday when they’re trying to get some between-the-sheets action.
So make sure that you keep the bedroom looking inviting, and get rid of the computer, the iPhone, the bills and the stacks of paperwork!
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2. You Avoid Oral Play
Surely by now you understand that men love to receive (and give!) oral sex. If it’s something you aren’t really into, we can guarantee that your man wishes you were, and is probably a little bummed out that you aren’t.
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3. You Run To The Bathroom As Soon As It’s Over
It’s an issue for women – it’s important to keep our parts clean, but running off to the bathroom as soon as the party is over can leave your man feeling a little put off.
First of all, men really do like to lay there and bask in the glow for at least a few minutes. And if you immediately run off to clean up, it could leave him with the feeling that you think you’ve done something “dirty.”
So if you can manage it, try to avoid running off to the bathroom so quickly. Perhaps keep a towel near the bed, or even consider using a condom so that there’s less to clean up.
4. Talking About The Ex-Boyfriend
Without a doubt, one of the worst bedroom sins is bringing up your ex. Your boyfriend does NOT want to think about the guy before him – even if you’re telling him how much better he does everything. Imagine how you’d feel if he brought up HIS ex while you were in bed together!
5. Your Bedtime Preparations Last Longer Than The Sex
Imagine the scene: You in the bathroom, washing your facing, applying creams and ointments, brushing your teeth, brushing your hair, shaving your legs… Meanwhile, your guy is lying in bed, eager and waiting for you.
Men really dislike this! For him, being with you and making love is a big priority and he wants to feel like it’s just as important for you. When you seem more concerned about your beauty routine, he may lose interest.
6. Sex Has Become The Same Old, Same Old
Any couple that has been together for a while can start to fall into the habit of having the same old sex every time; there’s nothing wrong with “comfortable” sex, unless you never change it up and it’s getting boring.
If you find yourself balancing the checkbook in your mind during sex, it may be time for you to start looking for something to spice up your love life. After all, you don’t want your man to think you aren’t interested – or that you don’t find him sexy.
Once sure way of adding some heat and spontaneity is to head out of the house and get a room in a hotel. Just one night of doing something different can bring back that missing spark.
7. You Never Make The First Move
In a recent survey, nearly a third of women said that most of the time, they let their partner initiate sex. I don’t know about you, but that sure doesn’t seem fair to me!
Every once in a while (or even more often!) you should put the moves on him and initiate sex. It lets him know that you want him and find him desirable.
8. You Make Him Feel Like You’re Doing Him A Favor
Of course you’re tired after a hard day of work, kids and housecleaning, but acting as if you’re having sex as a favor for him just isn’t cool. No one wants to feel like a charity case.
Saying something like “Whatever, just do it” is no way to maintain a happy relationship, and it may backfire when he loses interest in you.
9. Not Responding To What He Does
If you aren’t enjoying sex, it’s likely that your guy isn’t going to enjoy it either – like they say, it takes two to tango!
Mutual pleasure is always best, and if he can’t tell that you enjoy it, he’ll start losing interest. One of his main motivations is pleasing you – so help him out!
It’s sexy when a woman is self-assured and knows what she wants in bed – but he can’t tell what you want if you don’t tell him. You may want to speak up and literally tell him what you want, or you can show him by guiding him to the right place. But let him know that you are an active participant in the lovemaking.
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